2025 Reflections: Ebb & Flow - A Year of Staying with Myself

As 2025 comes to a close, the words that keep returning to me are ebb and flow.

This year didn’t move in a straight line. There were moments of deep momentum - and moments where my body asked me to pause, rest, and soften. At times, it felt frustrating. At others, deeply gratifying.

Looking back now, I see how much I’ve grown - not by pushing harder, but by staying present with myself through every season. This is a reminder of my 2025 resolution for a lighter, fun and spacious year and how much joy and growth this has brought me.

Learning to stay regulated, not perfect

This year brought physical procedures, emotional releases, and moments where my nervous system was tested - from surgeries to exhibitions, from ending a collaboration that no longer serves to unexpected breakdowns (yes, even washing machines!)

What changed wasn’t that challenges disappeared - but how I met them.

Instead of reacting, I learned to respond.

Instead of self-blame, I practised curiosity.

Instead of pushing through, I listened.

That alone feels like a quiet but profound victory. I might not be able to meet them in the way I wanted all the time, but practice makes progress. And that gives me new reference point to stay regulated amidst the mess.

When art became medicine

Art has always been part of my life, but this year it became something more.

Through affirmation art, chakra inspired works, workshops, and private sessions, I saw how creativity could hold people - including myself - in times of transition.

Watching women create, reflect, breathe, and write love letters to themselves reminded me of something essential:

We don’t need fixing.

We need space to remember who we are.

Art became that space - gentle, grounding, nourishing.

Finding my voice, one step at a time

From public speaking to emceeing, Japanese speech contests, and facilitating workshops - I learned that confidence grows with aligned action.

It grows because we show up - imperfectly, vulnerably, courageously.

Each small step built trust.

These small steps make huge foundational impact over time.

Letting myself be supported

Perhaps the biggest lesson of 2025 was this: I don’t have to do everything alone.

Friends, mentors, co-creators, and communities showed me that shared energy makes the journey lighter... and definitely more joyful.

Borrowing strength doesn’t make me weak. It makes me human and build connections.

A gentle invitation for you

As you reflect on your own 2025, I invite you to ask:

• What season did you move through this year?

• Where did you grow, even quietly?

• What did your body and heart teach you?

• What are you proud of - even if no one else saw it?

  
  

And as we step into a new year, perhaps the question isn’t "How do I do more?” but instead:

What if it was easy?

What if it all works out?

This is my final blog post of 2025.

Thank you for walking this year with me - in all its ebb and flow.

May you close the year with softness, slowness and space.

I’ll see you in 2026. 🤍

With gratitude,

Caihui